I’ve officially made it a week through the cleanse as of right now, Wednesday being finally over with in Chicago.  Now I have to finally figure out when I’m going to stop.  I told myself that I had to make a decision re: duration before the weekend was over, because if I decided to end it the day-of its ending, it would seem like a cop-out.  Like I was planing on going for 14 days, but I quit at 7 because I couldn’t take it.  Something like that.  Unfortunately, I never made a decision, which leaves me today still wondering.  I never was going to go 14 days, that’s just silly.  I was basically going back and forth between seven and ten.  Now that seven is up and I still have a bit of lemons left, I’m rethinking.

My brother says you should do it for at least eight days, which seems reasonable.  He did it for eight last year when I did it for ten.  Seemed like such a big deal then.  I kinda like doing it for ten because it just seems like a good, solid number.  Then again, so does seven.  For me, eight has almost no value to it, except that if I do less than what Grant did last year, I would be a failure.  Which means I should do nine, but that’s almost ten.  You see the problem…

Anyhow, the part that really bugs me is that I have enough juice already mixed up to last me probably until mid-way through tomorrow.  I don’t want to go to the store to buy more stuff, cause then I might as well just buy enough to last me the full ten days.  I don’t want to have any leftover punch, but I also don’t want to commit to tomorrow only to run out of the punch  mid way through the day.

The one, and I think strongest, argument for quitting is that I don’t like working out when I’ve only eaten lemonade and pepper.  It just doesn’t seem right.  Now that I have a membership to the Y, (and I’ve worked out two days in a row!) I feel like I should get some real food inside of me.  Anyhow.  Short post tomorrow with my decision.  One final thought regarding the cleanse, after the jump…  (It’s  kinda gross, that’s why there’s a jump.) …Thanks for sticking with me through this.

People ask me what the cayenne pepper is for.  The lemon juice clearly has vitamins, the syrup has sugar, the water…  well, the water has two parts hydrogen to every part oxygen.  But why the pepper?  One Cleanse FAQ says the pepper is there to keep your body temperature high.  It even says people in cold climates should add pepper.  I think that’s a myth, that they’re playing with our confusion of hot like picante and hot like the opposite of what it’s like in the winter.  The real explanation occurred to me as I continued reading this FAQ.

One of the questions said something like, “Is it normal to experience a burning sensation during bowel movements?”  (Yes, this is the gross part.)  The answer is something to the effect of “During the cleanse, you are getting rid of harmful toxins in your body.  That’s what the burning sensation is.”  I’ve already mentioned that I don’t believe in “toxins” any more than I believe in fairies.  Without toxins, there’s no explanation for the burning booty.  (I told you, kinda gross.  Sorry.)  Fine.  If that’s the case, then what is the burning?  Could it be the cayenne pepper?  Could it be that they only tell you to put the pepper in so that it will burn as it exits stage south?  Could it be that the toxin thing is just a silly myth with no truth to it and the pepper is the real culprit?  I think I’ve just solved the case.
Sorta related question: Is the inside of your intestines smooth like the inside of your mouth, or is it like a sea anemone?