• I'm in Memphis and I can't find a milkshake. #hungry #angry #layover #
  • Houston skyline. Yup, that's the Houston skyline. Or part of it. Some buildings, anyhow. http://t.co/BqmqMEQJ #
  • My parents have the most well-stocked bar in Texas. http://t.co/ffHlp0vt #
  • "I choose to be pessismurfstic. We're all gonna die." Smurfing the Smurfs smurfie and smurfinging a very smurf Smurftini with smurf. #
  • @ccbayer NOT EVEN *BZ?!?!?!?!?! #
  • Did you guys know that Miracle on 34th St is just a long, boring Macy's ad? #
  • Also, a long, boring testament to the incompetence of the post office. #
  • Fires going in the fireplace, on the tv, on the laptop, and on the ipad. Its beginning to feel a lot like Christmas. http://t.co/bxBBnW22 #
  • Donnie and Marie have been married since they were 14 and 16! Crazy. #

  • I'm in Memphis and I can't find a milkshake. #hungry #angry #layover #
  • Houston skyline. Yup, that's the Houston skyline. Or part of it. Some buildings, anyhow. http://t.co/BqmqMEQJ #
  • My parents have the most well-stocked bar in Texas. http://t.co/ffHlp0vt #
  • "I choose to be pessismurfstic. We're all gonna die." Smurfing the Smurfs smurfie and smurfinging a very smurf Smurftini with smurf. #
  • @ccbayer NOT EVEN *BZ?!?!?!?!?! #
  • Did you guys know that Miracle on 34th St is just a long, boring Macy's ad? #
  • Also, a long, boring testament to the incompetence of the post office. #
  • Fires going in the fireplace, on the tv, on the laptop, and on the ipad. Its beginning to feel a lot like Christmas. http://t.co/bxBBnW22 #
  • Donnie and Marie have been married since they were 14 and 16! Crazy. #

  • List: Band Math by Jonathan San http://t.co/v0EtfGoC #
  • Overheard: Why you ain't follow me on Twitter? WHY YOU AIN'T FOLLOW ME??? #
  • Anyone know any good jokes involving the former Vice President dancing and a problem solving procedure? …No? …Still no? #
  • @ccbayer @putridgoreart's birthday is hard on everyone. #
  • so much depends upon
    a red bomber jacket
    glazed with sun light
    beside the gas station. #jumpsuitcarlosjumpsuit http://t.co/ir8Gg44W #
  • .ti ekil t'nod i dna sdrawkcab si rettiwt wen eht #
  • My AlGorhythm joke didn't get the positive feedback I was hoping for. #
  • Someone has checked out all the books on Hungarian phonology, which means they must be writing my paper for me, which means I can go out! #

  • List: Band Math by Jonathan San http://t.co/v0EtfGoC #
  • Overheard: Why you ain't follow me on Twitter? WHY YOU AIN'T FOLLOW ME??? #
  • Anyone know any good jokes involving the former Vice President dancing and a problem solving procedure? …No? …Still no? #
  • @ccbayer @putridgoreart's birthday is hard on everyone. #
  • so much depends upon
    a red bomber jacket
    glazed with sun light
    beside the gas station. #jumpsuitcarlosjumpsuit http://t.co/ir8Gg44W #
  • .ti ekil t'nod i dna sdrawkcab si rettiwt wen eht #
  • My AlGorhythm joke didn't get the positive feedback I was hoping for. #
  • Someone has checked out all the books on Hungarian phonology, which means they must be writing my paper for me, which means I can go out! #