At The Debate Link, in a post about a recent poll, it was pointed out that “Hillary Clinton and John Edwards only beat Romney (whom Obama smokes).” I got a good chuckle out of this, as I often do, imagining my senator rolling up Romney into a giant joint, with Romney’s face aghast as he watches Obama light a match. Were I a cartoonist, or just someone who could draw, I’d whip that up in a second.

It’s also kinda funny given that Obama actually is a smoker, which is only funny to the extent that it’s actually been covered by a lot of people. That got me to wonder what Obama’s brand of cigarette is. Does he smoke some fancy imported, French, vanilla-imbued 100? Is he a Pall Mall Unfiltered type? Marlboro Light? Kool? To the average voter, this may be inconsequential, but I reckon the average smoking voter would love to know. So I did a search for “what does obama smoke?” I didn’t really get any results, but I did find something funny. The sixth listing is for Rush Limbaugh, who said “Nobody would have known who Obama is if Ditka would have run for the Senate.” You need an account to actually read the article, which I don’t have nor want, so I’m only taking the quote from the Google results. I’ll assume that Rush said it and that he meant it. (I think it’s a safe assumption.)

I wasn’t living in Chicago at the time of the election, but I remember the election and I remember a certain hopeful and misguided buzz about Ditka, and I remember the blogospheric laughter when Keyes ended up running. Wikipedia lists Obama as winning with 70% of the vote. I’m sure Ditka, an “ultra-ultra-ultra conservative” would have done somewhat better, maybe allowing Obama to win with only 68 or 69. I don’t remember my point, really, except that Rush is kinda silly and that it would be cool if someone drew up that cartoon I described so I could have another little chuckle.

UPDATE: According to the Huffington Post, Obama smoked/smokes Marlboro Reds. So somewhere between the Marlboro Lights and the Pall Mall Unfiltered I guessed. What does this say about Sen. Obama? If he smoked Marlboro Lights, I would have to label him as a wimp and thus unelectable. If he smoked Pall Mall Unfiltered, I would say he’s crazy and obviously has a deathwish, and thus unelectable. Being Marlboro Reds, I would says that he obviously has the guts to handle the gnarliness that is a Marlboro Red and intelligent enough to put a tiny cotton filter between himself and certain death. That’s the sort of man I want to be my President. (I probably would have changed my argument depending on whatever brand it was in order to reach that same conclusion. I mean, look at that smile!)